Dee's Sexiest Songs

Not my boobs. Unfortunately.

            Heyyyy kids! Buckle up, because D’s going to be talking about sex again!

Disclaimers:

-I will be divulging in way too much information about my own sexual preferences, so have your vomit bags on hand.

-Family members, squeamish friends, and people who think Marvin Gaye writes sexy songs, SKIP THIS POST. Seriously. This is one for family members to skip, much as I love you guys.

-This is another one of these posts that firmly places me in the category of Other. I’m definitely not on the freakiest end of the sex spectrum, by far, but make no mistake, my darlings, I am a twisted little girl, especially by vanilla standards. A great deal of you will not know a lot of these songs, and when you listen to them, you will be concerned for my mental wellbeing. And quite possibly the physical wellbeing of The Boyfriend. Ah wink.

            All my life, I’ve experienced music in a very visceral way. As I’ve mentioned previously, somewhere in the recesses of my dad’s dvd collection are home videos of Baby Dee hopping, spinning, and head banging in diapers around the living room to classic rock. Music is a direct link to both my mind and body; it spikes my blood with adrenaline, brings tears to my eyes, moves my hips, inspires me to write. I have never, ever understood people who “don’t really listen to music much.” It’s always been such an integral piece of who I am.

            Like everyone, certain songs, bands, and music genres put me in certain moods or remind me of points in my life. And some songs, bands, or music genres I just find incredibly sexy for one reason or another. Sometimes it’s the voice, other times the beat, other times the lyrics, but some songs just scream sex! to me. And once again, they might not be the songs that scream sex! to you, or anyone with more conventional carnal tastes. So let’s get to it! A quick note—these songs are not listed in any particular order. I couldn’t rank them if I tried. This is less of a list and more of a discombobulated rant of sexy, sexy songs. Feel free to give unfamiliar ones a listen!

Tear You Apart, by She Wants Revenge

                                     

            This song is sexy because of the lyrics. The beat is a good one, steady, something you can move to, but I actually find the guy’s voice a little…odd. But the lyrics are fantastic. It’s one of those songs that you listen to and think “Yeah, I’ve been there.” And the chorus is one of the sexiest things I’ve ever heard. It’s also a song that contrasts nicely with itself, in my opinion. Half of it seems like a crush like we’ve all had, getting nervous and fluttery when someone comes into the room, letting your feelings slip to a mutual friend and feeling that awful combination of excitement and dread for days afterward, etc. But the other side of this song is so much darker, bordering on obsession, a physical desire beyond one’s control. Either way he wanted her/and this was bad/wanted to do things to her, it was making him crazy…and now he wants to grab her by the hair and tell her…And honestly, that darker side is sexy. Granted, I or any other (sane) woman would absolutely not find a stalker or someone dangerously obsessed with them hot, but the thought of being so desired that the narrator of the song can’t stop thinking about you is a sexy thought. And for me, personally, the kind of sex that these lyrics promise is absolutely purr-worthy.

As I whisper in your ear, “I wanna fucking tear you apart.”

Topless, by Breaking Benjamin

    

            This is another song that blends obsession and desire into a darker spin. This particular song is more about hatred and lust, which is a combination I’ve always found attractive in movies and literature. Luckily, I haven’t run into that in my past relationships (once I’m emotionally wounded, my lust vanishes), but I know plenty who have. Breaking Benjamin is one of my favourite bands, and this song ties into my current writing project very well, and dammit, loving the enemy is a sexy idea. Just look at the Joker/Rachel Dawes or Freddy Krueger/Nancy fanvids on youtube, smooshing together bits and pieces of what were physical attacks in the movies and blending them to look like a romantic relationship. On a more vanilla level, just look at Pride and Prejudice, the story on which all “I hate you, you asshole…I’m falling for you!”-type stories are based. It’s an old dance, and the line between love and hate has always been a thin one, and there are many songs that illustrate this (Dope’s Bitch is a particularly direct example). This one happens to be one of my favourites.

Reptile, by Nine Inch Nails

                                       

            Oh, my God, this song’s beat is delicious. Slow, sensual, and somehow brutal. The expression in Reznor’s voice has always been one of my favourite things about NIN, and Reptile is no different. He seems almost lost in the sensuality of the beat himself, and threads of desperation and desire over which he has no control are woven throughout. This song is just…damn.

            Angels bleed from the tainted touch of my caress
            Need to contaminate to alleviate this loneliness.

            Another sexy song from NIN is Closer, of course, both in beat and lyric, but we all know about that one, so I don’t really need to elaborate.

So Cold, Static X

                                            

            First of all, don’t focus too much on the video for this song. Wayne Static, appropriately named, looks like an Amish guy who stuck his tongue in an electric socket, and that kind of kills the sexy. You know, unless you’re into that.

            That disclaimer aside, this song is sexy in beat, lyrics, and voice. Static’s voice is staggered and breathy; you can almost feel it caress your skin. Something about this beat just makes me writhe on the dance floor, and I’m not the only one. It was featured on the terrible movie Queen of the Damned (FUCK YOU STUART TOWNSEND!) and it truly is one of the ultimate vampire songs. It’s sensual with an edge of danger, hypnotic.

Tainted Love, Marilyn Manson

                                                   

            Oh, you broke my heart, Manson, you broke my heart.*

            Let’s hear it for the man who, like me, only looks good with a lot of makeup and a professional photographer. In my opinion, his cover of Gloria Jones/Soft Cell’s Tainted Love is one of his masterpieces. God fucking damn, this song is hot. If I were a stripper, this would be my song. It just makes the clothes fall off of you. We get the best of Manson’s extremely emotive voice, one of my favourite voices of all time. There is so much longing in Manson’s voice, always. Pain and longing. And it is in perfect balance with this song. The beat is simultaneously flowing and heavy, the guitars have a pulsing quality to them. Damn. I can almost hear the head post banging against the wall in the background. The way Manson remade it really lends itself to the lyrics, which are wonderful outside of the silly bounce in which they were entombed in the 80s. Just listen to this song, throw your head back and dance and writhe the way Manson wants you to.

            ….Ew.

When the Lights Go Out by the Black Keys

                                                        

            There is something just effortlessly sexy about this song. It’s the theme song for Black Snake Moan, a movie I absolutely adore, and it encapsulated all the heat from that film. Just listening to it makes me think of cigarette smoke curling in the dim light of a bar, sweat clinging to flesh under the Southern sun. It’s hot, sultry, smooth; like sex with someone you have crazy chemistry with.

I Want Your Blood, by Combichrist

                                     

            Combichrist is damn good at creating beats you just want to fuck to. They have that pulsing club quality that reminds you of dark dance floors crowded with glistening bodies. I Want Your Blood has lyrics that you either find hot or you don’t. It is very bluntly about possession in a very BDSM way, about completely owning a person, being in complete control of another human being, consent questionable. It takes you to a place with no light, with the bite of handcuffs and the feeling of your pulse pounding in your throat in time with the beat.

Point of No Return/Music of the Night, The Phantom of the Opera

           
                                     

            The lyrics are what are sexy about these songs. My invisible/imaginary blog followers know well my lifelong, er, preoccupation with The Phantom, in both book and musical form. Both of these songs have been talked to death, but in short, both songs are about abandoning yourself to pleasure, ignoring any ramifications, not caring if it’s right or wrong or even if it’s the truth. Point of No Return is the far more direct song, but I can’t exclude Music of the Night because of the element of surrendering not only to pleasure but to someone else. There’s something sexy about that, though I find Music of the Night to be far more comforting than sexy.

In my mind, I’ve already imagined
our bodies entwining, defenseless and silent.

Vermilion, by Slipknot

                                     

Corey Taylor’s voice and words say it all. Longing, lust, obsession completely beyond control; desire you’re almost afraid of. It also insinuates that this lust is for a fantasy, nothing more, and that makes it more tragic: She isn’t real. I can’t make her real. Again, all-consuming passion, apparently a running theme in my bedroom songs of choice.

She is everything and more
The solemn hypnotic
My Dahlia, bathed in possession.

Take it All Away, by Red

 

                               

            Okay, honestly, I have no real explanation for this one. It just feels sensual to me. The lyrics aren’t terribly sexy, nor is the beat. His voice is, a little bit, but it’s all about sorrow rather than any desire. But…I don’t know. I feel some sort of sexual dynamic at work in this song. Maybe I’m just insane.

Sexual Violation, by Agonoize

                                         

            Yeah, obviously I think aggrotech is a sexy genre. This song would be Stripper Dee’s encore. It’s repetitive, with a constant, unchanging beat and very simple lyrics by artists who don’t have the strongest handle on the English language, but oh, this song is sexy. Just the couplet my breath, your sweat is fantastic. Again…purrrr.

Blood, Oil, Gold, by Solace

                                     

            I’m a belly dancer. Bite me.

            This song takes a minute to get going, but it’s fantastic. The muffled baladi beat coupled with the distant stretches of sound takes you to a dark, sensual place, a place with Turkish rugs on the floor, candles, and smoke rising from incense.

            Let me add a disclaimer: Belly dance is not a sexual dance. I have danced with children and grandmothers in my journey through this beautiful art form. However, there is something inherently sensual about the movements, if executed in a certain way. And I have been known to use my powers for evil.

Bind Torture Kill by Suicide Commando

(side note—the intro is long, it revs up after about a full minute. And other side note—I do not find murder sexy.)

            Okay, before you throw me in the nut house, hear me out. Yes, it’s inspired by Dennis Rader, aka the BTK killer. Yes, its lyrics are about…you know…killing somebody. But…but…come on! Listen to the beat! The growling lust in the vocals! I mean, come on! This beat was made for throwing someone against the speakers in a dark isolated corner of the dance floor and just…!

            Yeah, maybe I’ve got a problem.

Parasitic/Crwn thy Frnicatr by Psyclon Nine

            All right, we all know my obsession with this band. Pretty much every Psyclon Nine song is sexy to me, but these two are the sexiest. The lyrics aren’t about sex or desire at all, so this is all about the cruel beats. Parasitic is slower, but the bass is deliciously brutal all around. Friends of mine are frightened of this song. One of my more religious affiliates described it as “a song for Satan emerging from Hell.” She was joking…kind of. Anyway, what makes her scared of this song is kind of what makes my heart pound; the bass, the grating strings, the machine-gun-like percussion riff. Crwn thy Frnicatr is just…purr. It starts with that dark circus-esque string melody and just erupts into a chaos of beats, screams, something that might be a synth or a haunting choir. Ooh, and then all that chaos dissipates into something slower, with the crest and break of sex itself, and bam, it erupts again. Ah, perfection. Dark, sexual perfection. Psyclon Nine isn’t right for everybody, but oh, they are so, so right for me. Mmmmmhm.

Noize Guerilla, by Chrysalide

            Oh, my dear sweet Zombie Jesus. This song. This song. First off, it starts out with a Brad Pitt quote, whom I don’t find particularly attractive in anything but Fight Club, and guess what movie it’s from? God bless angry goths’ obsessions with “edgy” movies. And this beat, this ruthless, blood boiling beat…!

            Let me tell you something. This song is the sex you’re afraid of your own longing for. The sex you’re afraid is ‘going too far’. It’s being kissed as if your lover wants to eat you alive, with lips and teeth and tongue. It’s the sensation of teeth sinking into the flesh of your neck just hard enough to hold that edge of real pain, hard enough to leave raised marks for days afterward. It’s the feeling of your back being ground against the wall with the force of another body sealed against yours. It’s a hand balling into a fist in your hair and jerking your head back to expose your throat to someone’s lips. It’s being bound and not knowing if a caress or a strike is coming next. It’s the half-crazed look in your lover’s eyes that makes you think for a moment that they just might go too far, and that edge of fear just stokes your desire.

            Let it happen. You know you want it.

PS-if that last paragraph just made your squeamish and uncomfortable, relax. I did not just copy a passage of my diary or anything. Only my sex partner knows the full extent of my inner freak, and I like it that way.

*A quick rant: Manson is an artist who, whether you love or hate him, did a great deal for music. He’s a legend, his covers are amazing, and he even has a couple good original songs. But oh, dear God, if this man had any respect for his legacy, he would fucking retire. He started tumbling downhill with Eat Me, Drink Me, and his latest album was a joke. His live performances are painful to watch. Please, Manson, please. We all love you. Don’t ruin the kingdom you’ve built. Retire, man.